Scientific Method

Johnny Blazes describes hirself as a bricoleur, an artist who uses materials on hand to create new works. And ze has done it again. Blazes has collaborated with local artist/performer Madge of Honor to put together a new monthly show in Boston, the likes of which you will have never seen, and won't be able to see twice.

The show, which is aptly named Hypothesis, is a showcase of all kinds of performers (poets, songwriters, jugglers, burlesque dancers, etc). Here's the catch, each performer is challenged by Blazes and Madge to create a brand new performance piece that is both entertaining and intellectually engaging. The challenge to the artists changes each month.

Last Tuesday, 9/21, the theme was "Reinvention." Performers were asked to perform a classic piece in the first half of the show, a piece they had performed before and that they knew was successful. In the second half, the performers presented a re-invented version of the same work, changing mood, perspective or media in order to bring new meaning to the art.

The night featured performances from Kirby Bits (drag/burlesque), Ben Reynolds (object manipulation), Alicia Greene (poetry and dance), and Simon Rios (singer/songwriter/guitarplayer), and of course from Johnny Blazes and Madge of Honor. After the show the Audio Chemists rocked a dance party until wee hours while guests sipped on fluorescent elixirs.

The show was amazing and I am so glad I went. Each artist's attempt at subverting themselves in their re-invention of their "classic" piece, was met with laughter, gasps, tears, murmured affirmations, and sometimes even outright shouts of delight from the crowd.

Others acts, such as Reynold's unbelievably fluid object manipulation and Johnny's character piece were filtered through a change in mood.

Johnny performed hir classic piece in which ze enthusiastically puts clothes ON to the song "I'm Bringing Sexy Back."  In the second act Johnny re-entered in a fit of emotional agony, having been rejected by an unseen partner. Ze followed all of hir original choreography, only this time hir movements were set to "Cry Me a River," and included clown-sized displays of sorrow and despair, which brought both loud "awws," and laughter from the audience.

Other artists took the idea of self subversion to a very personal level. Simon Rios presented a song in the first act that was an open letter to a friend of his who is suffering from alcoholism. And in the second act, Simon sang a song from his friend's point of view. In this imaginary response, Rios took on his friend's voice and accused himself of a laundry list of faults. As he sang the audience listened thoughtfully, and I believe, listened without judging him. I looked around and saw people nodding their heads, wiping tears from their eyes. And when he was finished the cheering shook the Midway.

One of the highlights of the night for me was watching Madge of Honor's re-invented version of a piece I'll call "Bounce." In the original  burlesque piece Madge's* tassel-twirling skills are comically rendered in a dance that never gets to progress past the first few measures of the song as the soundtrack continues to reset itself. In the second half Madge performed the same piece, but with an easel holding up a giant pad of paper. On the sheets Madge carefully had prepared an "Inner Monologue" in thick black marker. As the dance progressed, Madge removed sheet by sheet to reveal Madge's thought process. Some of the thoughts were comical, and others were self -disparaging. The crowd got into it, yelling responses to the revelations, and the piece quickly became interactive in a way that challenged the audience to look at their own perspectives on the art of burlesque.

I think this project is a wonderful idea, and I'm not just saying it because Blazes is an old and dear friend of mine. Asking creators to think about what message they are sending in their art produces bold and inspiring new works, that might otherwise not have come into being.

There's no other show in Boston where you will cry as a songwriter bemoans himself for his hypocrisy, and moments later laugh out loud as a drag queen grandiosely gestures towards her tiny, sparkled, limp member.

I can't wait to see what's cooked up in the lab next month.

The next Hypothesis will be tested in October with the theme of "Matter/AntiMatter."

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* Because I do not know which pronouns Madge prefers I am going to refer to Madge as Madge throughout this section so please bear with me.

save some water for the fishies*

It's officially the end of "Water Week," in Cambridge. No, really.

Ok. So, first, some background. On Saturday, May 1st a  huge water pipe in Weston, Massachusetts sprung a leak. The Mass Water Resource Authority was able to supply water for toilets and showers to towns east of Weston by using a back up supply of mostly pond water. This switch in water quality was the cause of a water ban and boil water order for Boston and surrounding towns. 

 The ban was in effect until midway through the day on Tuesday, May 4th.

I worked on Saturday, Sunday and Tuesday in Boston so I was affected too. However, I was able to avoid boiling any of my own water at home because within the last year I moved to Cambridge, which has its own water supply.

But not only was Cambridge not affected by the water ban across the river, we were actually celebrating how awesome the water here is.
That's right, May 2nd- May 8th was Water Week here in the People's Republic.

Activities included educational modules for school children about the "wonders of water," and a tour of the Water Purification Plant where we get our delicious, clean tap water from.**

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* The title of this post is brought to you by Things My Sixth Grade Teacher Used to Say in a Weirdly High Pitched Sing-song Voice While We Were Trying to Use the Bubblers at School.

** I'm only bragging because the ban in Boston has been lifted. Otherwise this would just be mean spirited.

the right to make things up to make people laugh

 So as I mentioned before, Improv Asylum Mainstage has a short run of shows at the Old South Meetinghouse in Boston.

It may be dorky of me to say so, but I think it's really cool to be doing a comedy show in the same room where the Boston Tea Party was planned in 1773. Growing up in Boston I was constantly exposed to its historical treasures. By the time I was nine years old I had memorized Oliver Wendell Holme's historic poem "Old Ironsides."  Voluntarily. Because I liked the boat. The high school I attended is even historical, the oldest public school in the country, alma mater to Ben Franklin, Sam Adams and John Hancock.  Because of all that, I'm no stranger to treating historical sites with familiarity and even (inevitably) indifference at times.

But the significance of the Old South Meetinghouse in particular is what I love the most about this run of shows.

See, in the 1920s the Old South Meetinghouse became a hot spot specifically for debates regarding free speech rights, an issue that was dividing people all over the country.
The Meetinghouse had, since its inception, been a place for public discussions including a program series called the Old South Forum. But as mayors in Boston (James Curley and Malcolm Nichols) banned books and plays to keep up with the rest of the nation, people began debating whether there should be limits on what kind of discussions were allowed at the Meetinghouse.

In 1929 the Old South's board put an end to the debates about free speech by declaring that anyone was welcome to speak in the meetinghouse "without regard to the unpopularity of any cause."

Which... explains how eighty years later I'm free to get up on stage and sing about how much I love to eat hamburgers. Or whatever else the audience wants me to sing about.

In the back of the meetinghouse there are some educational exhibits set up. Across from the life sized statue of Margaret Sanger* , a sign asks visitors if there is anyone they feel should be banned from speaking in public forums. The answers can be written on yellow slips of paper which are then entered into a plastic binder as part of an "ongoing dialogue about freedom of speech and dissent."

Most of the entries in the binder are from school children on class trips. In pencil most have answered along the lines of, "no, everyone should get the right to talk." Some made a caveat such as, "Everyone can talk if they agree to be respectful of other ideas as well." A few that made specific exceptions such as, "I would not let the KKK or nazis talk because their ideas are harmful to others."

But two entries made me giggle out loud.
The first, in a child's heavy handed pencil scrawl said "I would ban amateur comedians from telling jokes."
The second, also a child, but one who gripped the pencil less tightly said, "Only comedians should talk."

It's like they knew.

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* I do not know if it is actually life sized.

my city's still breathing but barely it's true

Wednesday was the kind of day at work where I suddenly would realize I'd been holding my breath and I wouldn't know for how long I had been doing it but how could I have possibly gone that long without taking a breath -

and then I would exhale. But then a little while later it would happen again. For twelve hours I had to keep reminding myself not to hold my breath.

Yesterday wasn't a much slower day. It became apparent even before 8:00am as I moved past another nurse in the hall.

"You just sighed," he pointed out, "everything ok?"

"Oh that, " I replied reluctantly, "that was just me breathing."

I got out of work late, tired but restless. I pushed through the throngs of people waiting outside of BMC for the bus and decided to walk to the next stop. Then the bus caught up but all those people from the BMC stop were already on it. So I kept walking. I missed two more buses and before I knew it I was at the Mass Ave bridge. It was now 5pm, and I had spent most of my walk talking on the phone to my mother.

I wondered if I had been breathing much. I guessed not.

So I stopped on the bridge. I put the phone away.

The sky to the East was a muted, periwinkle blue, but pearly and back lit, and it perfectly matched the color of the ice covering the Charles. Despite the wide semicircle of dark buildings dotted with glowing lights, splitting the sky from the water, it was possible to view the two as one entity. The regularity of the car lights coming and going against the neat rows of building lights gave the scene a methodical, orderly feel that was altogether reassuring. Still the effect of constant sparkling against the dark concrete and steel frameworks hinted of faery lights, mischief, and magic. The old John Hancock Building (now the Berkeley Building) lit its weather beacon as I watched lights turn off in the offices on floors below. Behind me the sunset was tinging the clouds light orange behind the Citgo sign.

I stood there for a very long time. In the middle of the city that I love, walkers, joggers and bicyclists passed me by. I put my hands on the railing and watched the ice and the sky fade at the same rate.

And I just breathed.

Medical volunteering in Haiti

Partners in Health (PIH), and Doctors without Borders (MFS) both have medical personnel ready to deploy at a moment's notice for disaster response.

I am not part of any agency that would have sent members to Haiti during this time. But it's not surprising to have heard several people from various local public service roles wonder if there is something they can do that's more active than sending money.

The more I settle into my identity as "nurse," the harder it is to not imagine myself responding in person to emergencies of this magnitude.

I have since been convinced that the most useful thing any of us can do is send money right now.

However, as Deval Patrick mentioned at the meeting on Wednesday night, a time may come when more volunteers are recruited for various relief efforts in Haiti.

For any of you who may be interested in that you can contact Richard Chacon, Director of the Office for Refugees and Immigrants, through Deval Patrick's office at 617. 725. 4000.

You can also call the Massachusetts Emergency Management Agency at any time by dialing 211.

As always, it's a number you can call to get critical information about human and health services (like "where can I bring this confused old lady I just found?") or to obtain information during a disaster or public emergency.

You can use this service to inquire about smaller groups being organized for relief work (if and when that phase of response comes about).

Until then please send all the money and prayers you have.

Relief for Haiti

I was pouring medications at my med station when I heard a cell phone ring.

Looking up and expecting a patient, I was surprised to see a coworker grab at her pocket and bring a phone up to her ear without even looking at the number on the screen.

"Hello!" she started. then silence. "Mmmhmm," she said, and then, "Ok. Ok. Ok."

This particular co worker is a wonderful and hard working nurse for whom patients always come first, so her answering a personal call in the hallway was an immediate red flag.

"Are you ok?"

"No," she said, putting the phone away, "my entire family is in Haiti." And then, "I haven't heard from anyone."

She spent the shift quietly working with her patients; I thought I heard her sniff once, but I looked over and she was bent over a set of orders.

As we sat having lunch she showed me photos on Facebook of her home town, destroyed.

"I went to school there," she said pointing to a once cheerful blue and white building covered in dust. The building's roof was completely caved in.

"I hope the nuns are ok. That's where they lived."

We stared at the photo, each of us lost in our own thoughts.

All over our building, all over our program, all over the city and state, people tried to carry on their days here while their hearts and thoughts were miles away in Haiti.

I know some of you have already gotten this information from Twitter, Facebook or CNN.com or wherever, but for the sake of organizing I thought I'd engage in some repetition.

Money, money money. Money is what is needed the most right now. Money to fuel the organizations that specialize in relief action. At the meeting held last night at Holy Cross, the resounding themes from every speaker were patience, prayer and money. There will be a time soon for canned goods and food, and even for more volunteer groups to deploy, but right now, money is the biggest need.

The problem is there are a lot of places that are asking for money right now.

So which ones do you pick?

The important thing is to try to channel funding into the most useful organizations. The programs with the infrastructures most suited to immediate action.

The Mayor's office distributed a list of the most useful places to donate at this time. These organizations are reputable, powerful and your money will be put to immediate and efficient use:

The Red Cross (website or text "HAITI" to 90999 to charge $10 to your cell phone)

Yele Haiti (website or text "YELE" to 501501 to charge $5 to your cell phone)

Partners in Health (through their website)

Catholic Relief Services (through their website or during Masses in Boston upcoming weekends)

Additionally, Mayor Menino has established a Haitian Family Relief Fund at Bank of America. You can make donations directly to the fund through Bank of America or through The Fund for Boston Neighborhoods, Inc, at City Hall.

I think that in situations like this it's rare that there's a whole lot we can do. And of course we all want to do something, but it's paralyzing to think that it wouldn't be enough anyway.

However in this case I am convinced that our pocket change will make a remarkable difference in the outcome of this first critical stage for life saving efforts. There are so many people willing to help with search and rescue, and all they need is our financial support to facilitate their aide. So let's do it.

a week of moments like this one

Because it was there when I got off the train I took the #1 to work today.
As I sat sipping some yerba mate and reading The Metro I heard a noise that immediately made my heart sing.

I looked up at the bus ceiling, willing my eyes to adjust to the shadows of the crevices where wall met roof.

Then I realized that what I was hearing was someone playing with their ipod touch.

...not a gecko at all.

Urine Trouble #2

Scrolling through the comments, I could not believe the number of people who don't even know Debbie making the most rude and crude criticisms imaginable. Some people accused her of trying to get her name in the paper. Which is funny since Debbie turns bright red whenever she's the center of attention and shakes when she has to give employee recognition speeches once a year. One person said that "Thornton is the type of person.." who would get upset if someone said a church steeple was "erected." That one was also funny since Debbie no doubt, like most nurses, left behind the prim and proper at the door a long time ago. Nursing is no place to be coy or prudish. Professional, yes. In denial about bodily functions? No.

It was hard to see so many strangers rip Debbie to shreds on the internet so casually. As they sipped their morning coffee they typed noxious generalizations about a woman they don't know. Either stealing from their desk jobs by surfing the net at work, or sitting at home in their underwear they judged Debbie soundly with definitives about what kind of person she is and whether or not she should be in the profession she's in.

And they weren't just rude to Debbie, even some of the people who backed her up said things about the MBTA that were unfounded and hateful. Debbie doesn't think that all MBTA drivers are "lazy," or "stupid," and she certainly didn't imply, as one commenter did, that the man was "intoxicated." Why the hate? Then, when people couldn't agree about a point, they turned on each other - the jurors in this imaginary trial devouring one another before a verdict could be reached.

How quick we all are to judge. In some cases it's a good thing, it's why our brains are hardwired to do it in the first place. Is that berry poisonous? Will the man approaching me on the street strike me dead or wave hello? But we've done something wrong when we can sit at home and hang people with mere keystrokes. Especially people like Debbie, a nurse who has spent her life taking care of other people, and most recently in her career, people for whom few others have any pity, any compassion or any time.

Then again, most educated people know that the rumblings of idiots in the comments section of Boston.com articles mean very little. They are rendered immediately useless by the casual access of the authors. And isn't my blog, by definition a bit of the same? In condemning those rude commentators aren't I exercising the same right they were?

In the end, we should be thankful that we're allowed to call to report things that we believe are wrong. And... we should be thankful that people are allowed to argue in a public forum over whether or not it was really wrong. Because we could be living in a police state. We could be living in a country like China right now. We could be in any number of small dictatorships all over the world but instead we're here.

Thankfully Debbie was able to laugh about the majority of the comments as we scrolled down the list in her office this morning before work. She's a very strong woman, a great leader, definitely not a prude or a "peeping Jane," and will not be quitting the medical field any time soon. Or definitely not before it becomes legal to just pee anywhere you want, no matter what you're doing or who's around.

Sorry, Boston.

Urine Trouble - #1

The DON was in the news last night, but not for anything that had to do with our work.
I usually refer to her as the DON, but in this Globe article her full name is stated, so I guess we can all be candid from here on in. I'm not going to get to my point until the last paragraph or so, so settle in for a long winded ride on this one.

Debbie is in the news because she reported a bus driver in Boston for getting off the bus and urinating on a city street.

At first I wasn't sure why this was newsworthy, but one glance at the comments section of either the article linked above or this one, will explain everything.

People are furious. And they are either furious at the man... or in many cases, at Debbie. In fact, the article was mostly about Debbie, and the comments are ALL about Debbie.

The criticisms of Debbie range from making no sense at all...

"Leave it to a nurse to complain," writes reindeergirl.

"Seriously, Ms. Thornton you work in nursing. You should know better."

... to personal attacks:

"Thornton..I hope someday you have to go so bad you can't wait and you embarrass yourself in front of everyone.....you are a snob!"

"Thornton you really need to focus on yourself. I'm blown away by how inconsiderate you are. I hope at your job you aren’t given normal bathroom breaks. Wow..."

Some people even tried to drag the homeless into it:

"She works with the homeless and is complaining about this?
If one of her clients were arrested or disciplined for the same behavior I bet it would be quite a different story." *

And more than one person stated straight out that she shouldn't be allowed to be a nurse. This is one of them:

"This could happen to anyone including you ms. thornton. Maybe you should resign from the medical field because the compassion you show here should never be allowed in a hospital or a medical facility."

I promised myself I'd get right down to the point I was trying to make, but I want to rip on this one for a minute.

First of all, Debbie is in her forties and has never gotten out of a car in downtown Boston, dropped trou, squatted and peed. So "this could happen to anyone even you," is a little silly.
Then the other half, "maybe you should resign from the medical field..." Seriously? Since Debbie is a nurse she has to be okay with public urination? What if your nurse in the hospital relieved himself in a potted plant because he couldn't make it to the staff bathroom? How compassionate would you feel? Would you argue that maybe your nurse has a bladder problem and invite him to pee on your flowers every day? Would you be okay with someone saying "well he did his job, so let him alone?"

Compassion is good and fine, and has it's place but if nurses ruled only with compassion without any thought to best practice, boundaries, or greater community good then everyone who said they had a little back pain would be high on vicodins, no one would have to pay for health care and there'd be no beds left in the hospitals because people would just be living there treating the CNAs as hired help. Compassion doesn't mean letting everything all go to hell in a handbasket.**

Now listen. If you don't agree with what Debbie did, that's fine. I know a lot of people would have looked the other way.
They're thinking "the guy is human! When you gotta go, you gotta go!"
But why take out your outrage about the human condition in working class America on Debbie? Get outraged about the long hours for MBTA drivers. Or about the general rush of American life which made the man feel like he couldn't pull over for a more legal or legitimate bathroom break.

There are also a number of people who side with Debbie on the issue, most of those comments for some reason are left on the second article, whereas the more scathing quips are on the first.

The people who agree with Debbie point out that the bus driver was in uniform, abandoned his post, and didn't explain anything to the worried passengers.

"I agree with person who reported this; an unscheduled stop for an emergency is one thing, an unscheduled stop to urinate in public is quite another. It is an incredible display of disrespect to have a bus with people on it wait while you urinate in a public place."

Others chimed in that if the bus driver had explained what was going on, it would have been more excusable. Still others mentioned the fact that the man, in fact was breaking a law.

And friends, you can argue til the sun goes down about whether or not it's a stupid law but it is still a law and the law is that you can NOT urinate in public here. I think plenty of laws are stupid***, but they're still laws. And if we're going to have laws, we need to either uphold them or protest them until they are no longer laws. Otherwise they're just suggestions.

I'm not going to tell you how I feel about the issue with the bus driver because that's moot. I don't even want to talk about whether or not a bystander should report public urination. I want to talk about people.

(See next post)

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* Actually when homeless men or women urinate in the street it's because they are intoxicated or mentally impaired. Most people without homes when sober and right minded are actual hyper vigilant about dignity and privacy because of the social stigma they already face. (Sigh).
** Or a puddle of urine.
*** Plenty.

Publish Post

Women in Comedy

Today marks the start of the Women in Comedy Festival in Boston, MA.

From the website:

The ImprovBoston Women in Comedy Festival celebrates Boston comedy and the women who create it, support it, and perform it. Bringing together women from all walks of comedy: improv, sketch, film, and stand up, the festival gives Boston comedy audiences a chance to see comedians who have refined their act here in Boston and moved on to other cities, as well as local up and coming talent.

Check out the full schedule for the next few days, and drop in for some ladies and laughs.

Hopefully I'll see you there tonight! And don't forget to come out and support Three Hole Punch tomorrow night as part of Bastard Inc's regular 8pm show.

sleeping on thin doors

Tonight is opening night of Three Hole Punch presents Flirty Laundry. We can't wait to see you there, so you better come. Yes, you.
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One of my former patients came to visit the facility last week. I didn't recognize him he looked so good. He was a sick, very sick and depressed dying man the last time I had seen him. he loves his new place. He decorated it. He stopped drinking. He said he often has his homeless friends over for meals. He is getting a cat.

Yesterday the Globe reported that in the past year the number of homeless families in the city has increased by 22%. Today an article appeared in my homeless news feed that explained the proposal for dealing with this growing vulnerable population. The breakdown is that Boston is trying to adopt a Housing First policy in the hopes of decreasing the total number of homeless individuals but especially to decrease the total number of families who have no homes.

The main concept of Housing First as a social policy is that before an individual can deal with the issues that caused their homelessness he or she needs a roof overhead. According to Maslow's hierarchy of needs, the physiological needs of a human being must be met before safety, love, esteem or self actualization. Housing First brings to our attention that people can hardly be expected to be successful at meeting even the most basic of physiological needs (sleep, food, sex) without a consistent (and safe) shelter.

Housing First style programs exist in major cities all over the States though the concept is relatively new (1990s or so). If you google "housing first," and "boston," you can find statistics on how successful of a policy it is. This is particularly relevant if you know much about (or care about) the history of how homelessness as a social issues has previously been approached. The other major approach to dealing with chronic homelessness (by which I mean to exclude "newly" or transitionally homeless persons) is known as the Continuum of Care. Continuum of Care is still very much also in practice and it is the movement of the homeless through a system of "levels," which would ideally and ultimately lead them to an independent and permanent living situation. This is more in line with Maslow's familiar pyramid design. Get them into shelters so they can meet physiological needs (treat their physical and mental medical conditions so they become stable) and then they can look to achieve the rest of the steps on the way to safety and security.

Each policy has its place. And each one has weak spots. Housing First works well because obtaining a stable and safe dwelling place does in fact create an overall higher success rate for meeting physiological needs and then some. It is especially effective, I need to point out here, for families. However, for individual people who have spent years and years on the street in a community of other homeless people, an apartment can be an isolating and lonely experience. And many of them report that they still sleep outside or at least on the floor. A house doesn't replace a social network. And a house can't cure mental illness or addiction. On the street, someone who ODs may be taken to an ER by a buddy. Unfortunately I have had several former patients die from overdoses once they were housed.

Continuum of Care helps to prevent that scenario. People are placed in public shelters, and then agency shelters, then transitional housing, and then (ideally), their own place. The transitions from level to level help people to network and make the changes they need. For example, an alcoholic may only be accepted to certain programs based on how long he or she is able to document sobriety. This is meant to ensure that by the time this person gets their own housing they will be functional enough to deal with it. However, many individuals will never make it to the highest "level." It is difficult to find decent work while living in a shelter, even an agency shelter. It's difficult to stay sober or clean living amongst others with similar addictions. And constant rejection from employers or future landlords because of CORIs, lack of background information or just straight up bias can be damaging enough to the morale that people give up and end up on the streets again. Also, I suppose it bears saying that this strategy is not as effective for entire families.

I think Housing First policies are far more useful because they work for solo flyers and families. They create a safe and dedicated place where people can become successful on their own terms. However, in the future of homeless outreach I would like to see more strategies put into place to prepare individuals for "inside," life after years of rough living. They need a place to learn skills. Like how to balance a checkbook or budget a paycheck or shop for food for a week. I would like to see programs to enable much more follow up from case managers, mental health workers and occupational therapists. And I would like more attention paid to the fact that people form their own families in the street and that depression and lonesomeness are very real problems when suddenly everyone you love and know are far away.

Delicious

Caroline, Amy and I walked to WholeFoods after work and bought sushi, berries and some mango juice and then had a picnic on the grass near the Christian Science Center. I hadn't "hung around" there since high school, and said as much to my dining companions. I wonder if I would have recognized myself if I saw 25 year old me there when I was 15. I can certainly pick out the old me out of a crowd, but I don't know if it's as easy the other way around.

Boston, you sly artsy sneak.
You set up walls and walls between us for so long -
you knew it was the only way you'd have me back: just longing for your days like these.

Then we lined up and waited for Summer Shack to open so we could get mojitos before I had to leave for Goresfest rehearsal, but alas, I lost my license last night at The Field where I had gone with Bobby, Dana, Shannon, Sean and Michelle to watch the debate.

So no mojitos for me, but it was a fabulous way to let go of the day before going to rehearsal.